Thursday, 23 July 2015

The "0" that I love

"0" can merely be an empty circle, nothing's inside, hollow with no chance to stay in, or you can take it as an optimistic "0", never give up, a fighter; rotating at its own pace, looks empty (to the normal eyes) but full of the invisible magic inside (to the heart that ventured it),

I have always love how one "0" can be full and nought at the same time, and how you need to use your own heart to define. xx

posted from Bloggeroid

Tuesday, 26 May 2015

Two dimly "sorry" on one cold morning

And I said "sorry", only to heard another "sorry" have been replied back to me, rains are drizzling outside,

I took a big steps each -- even half of myself not sure why I was so rushing to be away, nor did I glimpse back. (even part of my heart want to)

Its a no start and no ending story. Almost not even a story.

But I'm writing it anyway.

Hoping that "sorry" linger around longer, xx

posted from Bloggeroid

Sunday, 24 May 2015

Some things are more visible through distance

*Only, if we see it thoroughly

Distance can made the gigantic sun small--

Nobody know that the sun is really much bigger out there if we just stand here (figuratively), we see what we choose to see and without wisdom we will always believe that the sun is really that small. Do not be blinded by distance, there are so much more beyond our naked eyes (K)

posted from Bloggeroid

Wednesday, 20 May 2015

The Obsequious Clouds

Pic taken on 17 May 2015.

"Wherever the wind blow, clouds will follow".

And the clouds let the wind dictates their way, they will just follow, however far, absurd or risky that way is -- You don't be like clouds, but be you. (K)

posted from Bloggeroid

Thursday, 30 April 2015

The Beautiful Rain

Taken from Imgfave
*Mind you, I like rain.

Just I found it so funny today, since last week, almost everyday I brought my umbrella to work, eventhough at the end of the day the sky was so bright and shiny. Yup indeed, it rained a few evenings last week, but I happened to already settled down at home laying on bed and reading my ebook, so I got no chance to use my umbrella actually. 

No chance at all. 

Each day I will neatly tucked it back to the thin slot beside the driver seat. Even so, I will never forget to bring it back to the office, the prospect of rain didn't scare me at all, just I wanna be prepare in term of times, cos sometimes I need to reach home early or fetch my lil bro, so umbrella can be sort of shield to avoid me stuck at one place when I need to be at the other. 

"But they plan, and Allah plans. And Allah is the best of planners". (8:30)

And while I was walking in the windy weather with dark clouds sorrounded me this evening -- Yea, I did cursed my forgetful self on why did I left that umbrella today, why I didn't turned back to the car when I realized I left it this morning, why it's raining when I don't have any umbrella with me? Can I reach to where I'm going (as per right now) my car without getting wet?

Then I remember this ayah above,

"What a shame Kiki!" 

I have always believed that there's something in "everyday", something that God want us to learn and put it in our heart, just perhaps sometimes we didn't realized as we are too rushed up with this Dunya. It could be anything, however small that things were, it could be people or places that we went to, it could be our own thought that lingered around in our mind. That "something" which we encountered "everyday" would be a chance for us to reflect and learn. But most of the time, we didn't realize, we let that moment passed by in front of our eyes.

And we lost it.

Sometimes we lost it with our own rapid time, worst, we lost it with our emotions, anger or perhaps when we are too sad over some issue, we forgot that it can be that "something" in "everyday" that God send to us, 

I often lost it too. But we need to continue trying right?

And more than often, I need to take time to realized it, time to sober up my mind from this beautiful Dunya. Sometimes I didn't realized about that "something" at all, I am so blinded with emotion. 

Yes indeed, we are not a good planner, nobody are. But no harm in trying right? 

And maybe yesterday we lost that "something", but we are here today right? Let's take the time to find it in anything that we do ;) 

As for me, today I forgot my umbrella only to realized that I shouldn't be so nonchalant about it, especially on this rainy season. And I learned how the feeling are when you put so much effort on something, then you stopped it half way only to realized that the next two steps before you stop is perhaps your victory. 

How does it feel? 
Yeah, its sucks! 

But its kind of amazing too cos I found my "something" in "everyday" today ;)

"How beautiful it is that we can learn when we found something and we can also learn when we lost something. Both words contradict each other but bring us to one which is Him."

*Taken from my other platform which I wrote 3 days ago
Have a happy day always! xx

Sunday, 22 February 2015

The heartache of expectation

I have always reminded myself about the heartache of "expectation", how I must not "expect" anything from anyone, how I should live my life and never allow anyone to easily hurt me, key is to not "expect" anything,

But then this silly heart of mine, always failed (each time). When I love (not that mushy kind of love) I let it ruled my life, too passionated with the emotion and I "expected" people to act like how I acted, to give back the same joy as what I gave them, or what I thought I gave them.

If they don't, it will break my heart.

Perhaps I'm the expressive kind, or worse I'm really not good in the love department, I'm an individualistic jerk who always "expect" even when I know that most loves are not mutual, nor balance, and there is no fair in love. (and life)

posted from Bloggeroid

Saturday, 21 February 2015

The circle of 2

Have you guys encountered this quote before, the one that people love to use as a self defence on why they didn't fight for what they love,

"If you love someone, set them free, if they come back to you, they are yours, if they don't, they never were"

Seriously all wrong! Fight for what you want! On what you believe in! Why simply give up? Don't leave it all to destiny and fate, man jadda wa jadda.

I always thinks that apart from all the serious problems in our world, our biggest problems are two,

1. Scared to voice out our feeling not only on love, be it anything, we afraid to give opinion, we wanna be fake and continue pleasing people or we rather be sad than try and show people what we thinks. We scared to be honest, and we don't want to accept that some truth can hurt us but it also will shaped us into better,

This will lead to problem number 2 which is,

2. Miss communications/miss perceptions

We always assumed about certain things, we ought not to try and clear up all the knots in our brain. We scared to ask why and come clear, we rather living in our own fairy world and judge based on our own perception. We believe on what we want to believe,

This circle of scared to voice things out and miss communications will continue forever unless we try to break the circle.

Nobody can do that but US.
Do not afraid to be you, to voice things out, do it because of Allah, Lillahitaala (For the sake of Him). And dont simply jump to any conclusion before you ask or before you analysed the situation better.

Fight hard on what you believe in, and then, leave it all to Allah. Above all, never expect anything from people, expectation can leads to heartache, leave it all to Allah, He will surely take a good care of our Heart ;) #somethingtoponder #selfreminderformyownsillyself

*Taken from my journal entry last year

posted from Bloggeroid

Thursday, 19 February 2015

Angin Damai

Aku mahu jadi angin,
tanpa terikat dengan mimpi siapa-siapa,
aku mahu jadi neutralist,
yang pasak hati hanya pada Tuhan,
aku mahu berhenti berfikir seolah aku tahu semua perkara,
aku mahu buang justifikasi,
dan lepas semua yang memang tak tergapai,
aku mahu ajar hati untuk mimpi berpada-pada,

Aku mahu jadi angin,
tanpa zahir tapi masih penuh rasa, 
terapung-apung, melayang,
tapi masih tak hilang diri.

Aku mahu jadi angin,
Damai dalam diam.


posted from Bloggeroid

Saturday, 14 February 2015


Before sunrise #nofilter

After sunrise #nofilter

Pic taken last week from my home window.

posted from Bloggeroid